Invited wi yer 'Holders Caird,'
Salute the lads wha man the guns,
An frae auld France will swipe the 'Huns.'
Yours but the privilege to pay,
Haun ower the cash to pave the way;
An smash up wi an unco jar,
This mad an sorry thing cried War.
Oor Lady Doctor will haun ower,
The earnins o her healin power,
She wid, we're sure, be pleased tae write,
Auld Hitlers 'Doom' in 'Black an Fite.'
An guid auld honest 'Droqqy' Weir
Wid jist invest a 'Thoosan' clear,
Frae ane John Fyfe we wid expec
Some 'hunners' written on a cheque.
The Dominie an Teachers tae,
Hiv 'Money' glintin in their ee.
Tho sair beset wi Income Tax
They'll help tae clad the new 'Ajax.'
The grocers noo are feelin frisky,
Since they can sell baith beer and whisky
We're sure up there they will arrive,
Luggin a curn scores o 'Fives.'
The Souters, Joiners, an the Smith,
Will bring their wads, an they're nae myth,
Tae 'Greenwood Tree' they will repair,
Aa marchin on wi heid in air.
The Tailor, Watchie, an the Chipper,
Will climb the hill like three young nippers.
An Watt an Stephen will dish oot,
Baith 'Stamps' an 'Bonds' tae new recruits.
The Bakers three will then appear,
Their baps sellt oot, an aa their gear,
Tho flour is scarce, an quotas low,
Ise warrant they'll cough up the dough.
An tho the 'Rant' is nae McPhersons
Baith 'Tam' an 'Sam' are likely persons;
Tae help us gain the longed for sum,
They'll teem their pooch an gar things hum.
An aa the chiels that sell us 'NEWS'
Will rob their tills an dicht their broos,
Come racin up wi aa their cash,
Nae thinkin ocht aboot the fash.
The Slater tae as weels the Mason
Will harl up a gie guid facin
O poun notes an weel scourt croons,
Their property for mony moons.
An ower the Brig there will come trippin
Oor freen an neeper, Mr Kippen.
He'll len tae us a hale weeks swag,
Proceeds frae 'Nips' that's 'in the bag.'
Syne aa the fouk that tak in boarders,
They've sure been 'taped' as likely hoarders,
Their hinmost coupon thae hae spent,
They'll Bank the lot, an be content.
An when proceedins they are hummin
Fa comes in by, bit Postie Cummin;
Tho up the hill he daily toils,
He's back again tae eke the 'Spoil.'
The Fairmer tae, since Peace is near,
Will for himsel buy far less gear;
An when he's been tae pey the Factor,
A Bond's far cheaper than a tractor.
An gin ye aa tak this advice,
We'll hae five thoosan in a trice;
Bit wid it be ower muckle trouble,
Tae scrap the 'five' an mak it Double?
Footnotes to the Scrounge
Hoose: Kemnay House
Laird: A M Burnett, father of Mrs Milton
Lady Doctor: Dr Florence Malcolm (Flossie) stayed in Finnercy, she emigrated to New Zealand around 1950
Droggy Weir: Alex S Weir, chemist, at one time in shop where Lingard is now. Moved across road to Bank Buildings where front door of top flat now is and managers office.
John Fyfe: Owner of Kemnay Quarries.
Dominie: John Minto Robertson, headmaster from 1923 to 1948. Noted for his annual production of plays by William Shakespeare in the policies of Kemnay House.
Grocers: Alexander Gordon and Son had the shop in the Square.
Peter Innes had the shop in Aquithie Road now operated by Costcutter.
Souters: John Shand had his shop in High Street, now the lower part of Melville Cottage.
Robert Reid operated in Thorpeville. The shop nearest the Public Hall.
Joiners: John Benton, The Cottage.
James Downie & Son, Kirkstyle,
Smith: R W Duncan & Son, Kirkstyle.
Greenwood Tree: The large beech tree in the policies of Kemnay House underneath which were produced the annual Shakespeare plays performed by the pupils of Kemnay Secondary School.
Tailor: Alexander Sangster operated a tailors business in the shop now occupied by K Styles in the High Street. He stayed in Tornahaish, and on retiring from the High Street, operated from a shed at the back of Tornahaish.
Watchie: William Bremner for long ran a watchmakers shop in what is now Lingards back shop. He stayed with his sister Mary in Louisville.
Chipper: The chipper at that time was in what is now Lingards front shop. The occupier during the war was one Maitland
Watt: James Watt was for many years bank accountant.
Stephen: James Stephen was postmaster and had a quick turn of wit. His wife was credited as author of the Scrounge.
Bakers three: For many years there were three bakery businesses operating in Station Road. In what is now the Gushet Neuk was Isaac Wright. The property in Leslie Place was occupied variously by MacDonald, Snowie, McKay, Milne, Taylor. The property now occupied by Brian Downie was built as a Temperance Hotel, but Alexander Henry started baking in a small way. This eventually took over from the Hotel. On the retiral of Alexander Henry, it was occupied by one Benton, then Crighton. The bakery was closed in 1968. The Shop now occupied by Alldays was built in the 1930s by the Taylor family who started baking here before later purchasing Leslie Place.
McPherson: E A McPherson, (Tom) ran a butchers business in Davidsons Buildings in the High Street. Now occupied by John D Rae.
Sam Mcpherson was a postman in the village.
News: J C Pickford ran a newsagent in the Bank Building before moving across the road to the shop now occupied by K Styles.
James Melvin ran a newsagent, tobacconist in Davidsons Buildings with the present door on the corner as the entrance.
Slater: James Mitchell who stayed in Reunion ran a slating business for many years. He was peculiarly fond of a dram.
Mason: A G Reid and his brother W B Reid were masons in the village for many years. Among the properties which they built was Ardennan which at that time housed four tenants. A G built the Knowe. He was land steward for Kemnay Estates for some time.
Mr Kippen: He was proprietor of the Burnett Arms Hotel. For many years the only licensed property in the village.
Postie Cummin: For many years a postman in the village, he stayed in Westhall. In his later years he acted as hallkeeper at the Public Hall.